Into the Blues

When i first heard that i was going to have the possibility to work from home – i said ok, that’s great. I wouldn’t have to lose the time that it takes to get to work, especially in a large metropolitan area such as Milan. I would also sleep more in the mornings, i would work straight out of bed, in my pijamas. I would not have to spend money on eating out at lunch-time. Also, i later discovered that working from home allows one to actually do some small things here and there – while a file loads ( one of my working files saves for 25 mins), i can just clean the house, take out the garbage, or even shower. I can work with a cup of tea by my side, not worrying about how i look, or what i am wearing.

During my lunch break i can go to the bank, the post office or whatever – something not possible with a job from 9 to 6 and an office that is in the middle of nowhere ( and i am not kidding, there is literally nothing around Blue Company HQ here in Milan Area) . And when i desire human contact i can go work from my graduated University, and, when i desire both human contact and free coffee and snacks, i can always go to the office.

So far so good.

But working from home actually means no human contact, no coffee breaks, and, most often than not, no lunch breaks either. It means actually starting work at 8 a.m. rather than being in the subway reading your novel on the kindle. It  means that when everyone goes home , because it is late, you keep on working, because you are home. It means that every day, day in and day out, it is just you and the computer. No experience sharing, no small talk, no learning from anyone else, no help, no complementing anyone’s attire or their success on that particular day. Only phone calls and impersonal e-mail communication. Or directed  ” kind suggestions”, ”  reminders” and “inquiries”.

Working from home means that i water my flowers more often than i should. And just like i nurture my flowers overtime, i dwell on certain matters and thoughts more than they deserve. And that is why my dreams are slowly fading away, just like the color from my begonia.

Yes, as explained here, i have a job. I need a career.

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