On Friday afternoon, some of the uncertainty that i had disappeared – and was substituted by another one, maybe (surely) even greater. I was told that there was a gap in the budget, and that the higher manager was re-positioned to a lower function, and that they may not be able to renew my internship at the end of June. Not only am i not getting employed, but i am actually on the street again. The it is not you, it is us talk.
The news was not totally unexpected – i knew that from the beginning. I should had searched for a job replacement by now, but somehow, the days are filled with work, and evenings and weekends… well, i guess here is where one would say i should be more careful how i invest my time.
I think that just as procrastination, avoiding making hard decisions is also embedded in human nature. After all, giving up the benefits of the present for uncertain benefits in the future is not easy, and could also be called a method of procrastination. Or just that – i am avoiding to make that decision today, and i will make it tomorrow…. Too bad that by the time this tomorrow comes, it will already be that future, and it will be without benefits, as the decision had not been taken in the past….